Use Everyday Routines to Build Language Skills In Young Children: It’s Powerful!

This episode of the Learn With Less® podcast is the second of a 4-part series about incorporating play, language, music, and movement, into everyday routines. These episodes feature a conversation between Ayelet Marinovich (pediatric speech-language pathologist, founder and creator of the Learn With Less® curriculum) and Miranda Zoumbaris (early childhood educator & interventionist, licensed Learn With Less® facilitator, and entrepreneur).

In this series, we’ll explore the four pillars of the Learn With Less® framework, and examine how we can incorporate more of each of those into our everyday routines to support connection and early learning. For each episode, we chose one routine and one everyday object, and explored the ways in which we could infuse developmentally enriching experiences into everyday life, and helping families see they can do this using the time, energy, and materials they already have.

Be sure to check over at our Instagram and Facebook pages (linked below) for additional content that may support your understanding and experience of these episodes. As we release each episode, we’ll link to them here in the show notes so you can access them easily.

In this episode, we discussed:

  • What is TALK (as we define it in the Learn With Less® curriculum), and how it can be woven into everyday routines
  • How to take the routine of nose-blowing and other self care routines, and incorporate more language into these moments
  • What kinds of language routines we can create with an item like a tissue or tissue box
  • Using language to create levity in a stressful moment – for both children and adults
  • How to incorporate language strategies into simple routines, using simple, everyday objects
  • The value of learning in community, of parallel processing with other families, and of experiencing the practice of following your child’s lead, through caregiver and child classes like those led by licensed Learn With Less® facilitators

Helpful Resources to Acknowledge For This Episode:

Daily Routines Freebie: download Miranda’s free handout about winter dressing, and get ideas for incorporating play, talk, sing, and move into your everyday routines!

Free Infant/Toddler Development Blueprint: what are the four major areas of early development… and how can you use the pillars of Learn With Less® to support that learning, using the time, energy, and materials you already have?! Download our free blueprint today.

How to Incorporate Play into Everyday Routines: our first episode in this podcast series, featuring a conversation with Miranda Zoumbaris and Ayelet Marinovich

How to Incorporate Music Into Everyday Routines, the third episode in this 4-part series!

How to Incorporate Movement Into Everyday Routines, the final episode in this 4-part series!

The Power of the Pause, an early Learn With Less® episode

Learn With Less® Facilitator Training & Certification Program, helping educators and therapists create lasting impact in their communities with a high quality, evidence-based, “plug & play” program

Expand Your Impact Workshop Bundle: for early childhood educators and developmental therapists hoping to serve new families in their community and support themselves, using their existing skills

Learn With Less® Bundle: our best infant and toddler development resources for families and educators alike, including our bestselling books Understanding Your Baby and Understanding Your Toddler, our acclaimed family music album, recorded Learn With Less® “caregiver & me” classes, and a caregiver handout featuring ideas for carryover in the home

Learn With Less® Stories: Testimonials from educators who’ve provided the Learn With Less® infant/toddler family enrichment curriculum and families who’ve experienced our programming.

Connect With Us:

Miranda: Website / Facebook / Instagram

Ayelet: Facebook / Instagram / Pinterest

Text Transcript of this Episode

Ayelet: Okay, welcome back to the Learn with Less® Podcast. Today I am joined by my current co-host Miranda Zoumbaris. Hi, Miranda!

Miranda: Hi! I’m so glad to be back!

Ayelet: Yay! Let’s go ahead… Last week, we had an episode all about that first pillar of Learn With Less®, which is PLAY. So, go back, if you haven’t listened to that, and grab all of the things that we talked about, listen to all of that, and catch up with all of the content that we’ve created over on Instagram and Facebook and places at @earlyinterventionmama and @learnwithless, and you can get caught up with all the great stuff all about PLAY. But this week… Miranda, what are we talking about this week?

Miranda: We’re going to talk about TALK! We’re going to talk about talk, and talk about playing with some tissues or tissue boxes.

Ayelet: Yeah, last week, we talked a little bit about what play is, and then different routine examples of using a specific object in play. This week, we’re going to do the same thing about TALK. And the object that we’ve chosen for this week is, as you said, that whole routine of blowing your nose. Blowing, the sort of handkerchief, nose blowing, tissue pulling type stuff. Tissues and self care, really, is the topic that we’re gonna chat about.

Let’s talk a little bit about what talk is, as we define it in Learn With Less®. I can start there. And then I’m going to hand it off to you to chat a little bit more about the different routines that we’re going to chat about. So when we’re talking about this pillar of TALK, what we’re really discussing is discussion, the act of discussion and observation. The idea of repetition with variation. Because every single day, we hope, you’re having some kind of conversation with your young child. Within daily routines… is such a wonderful time to really give into that discussion and observation. Instead of quietly changing your child’s diaper, this is a great opportunity to say the same kinds of things at the same time. Because then you’re repeating yourself and giving context to words.

So for instance, oh, let’s take it off, when you’re taking off the diaper. You can sequence events, and look at what’s coming next, and all of those things. So you’re repeating, and you’re giving a lot of consistency, but then a little bit of variation, right, the pattern adjusts a little bit each time. We’re also talking about, when we’re talking about TALK, we’re having this conversation about communicating for a variety of purposes, not just “what’s this, what’s that” – labeling, which is, I think, something that a lot of us as adults tend to get stuck in in terms of quizzing and drilling our little ones. That’s how oftentimes we’ve learned what learning is! It looks like taking tests and quizzing.

Also as the grownups in the room, we want to hear our children say those words, we want to see that they can identify something. We want to know what they know, we want to see what they know. We want to show our loved ones what they know. And also, because again, we’re talking about not just the but/or its AND. So, we want to communicate for a variety of purposes. We want to ask our child questions. We want to wonder aloud, we want to imitate them. We want to talk about what’s happening around us, how something feels, what it looks like. And notice what they are noticing – and say those things out loud.

And then, of course, we also want to communicate to our little ones using a variety of means and modes of communication, right? We know that right now, Miranda and I are sitting at two different computers looking at each other on Zoom, and she’s nodding, That tells me that she’s listening, right, and she’s smiling. That tells me that she’s engaged. And all of those nonverbal communication skills also assist in communicating and engaging with each other as humans. So whether it’s gestures and pointing or clapping. Or whether it’s moving towards or away from our little one. Whether it’s facial expression, or different kinds of motor movements, like hugs or pushing something away, not everything has to be positive! Really showing that there are so many ways to communicate what we need, what we want, what we think what we’re wondering what we’re questioning.

Then finally just modeling what you want to see both in terms of the kinds of communicative behaviors that you want your child to then imitate and replicate because goodness knows. Some of the things that I’m noticing in my nine year old right now are directly influenced by things that I’m like, Oh my gosh, I wish I wasn’t like that. I wish I didn’t do that to him because now he’s doing that to his little brother. That doesn’t feel very good. Yeah. How lovely. So just bringing that awareness to ourselves, because even from before day one, they are learning from us. So those are the pieces that I wanted to start with in terms of what is TALK. Right. So let’s talk a little bit about, Miranda, how to utilize routines with regard to this pillar of TALK.

Miranda: Yeah, absolutely. So oh my gosh, There literally is so much to talk about. So let’s really think about that self care routine and your child has a runny, gunky nose. So maybe you start by explaining what’s going to happen, if that works for your child. So you’re using language. I see you, you have boogers coming out of your nose. It’s about to get on your mouth. Let’s find a tissue to clean it up. Or maybe you want to give some choices. You know, you have boogers on your nose. Do you want to wipe or a tissue so you can wipe it and allowing them to do it, giving some choices! Or maybe you’re the one blowing your nose! And your baby looks up at you startled! Or you know, you’re running a Learn With Less® class and you make the children cry when you blow your nose!

Ayelet: I assume we’re speaking from personal experience!

Miranda: Yes. I did a playful sneeze, and I had about three crying babies. And they were like, Yeah, that’s kind of traumatic right now! You have to know your audience! But you have your tiny baby looking up at you because you just sneezed or you blew your nose – to useTALK to change the pitch and tone of your voice to let them know it’s okay. Whoa, you were startled, and I blew my nose – that was loud. And then you pause and look at your child and give them an opportunity to go oh! And kind of reconnect and that serve and return that we get with TALK, too. So I think in all those different examples, right? They’re just little micro routines that are happening around nose blowing, but we’re able to use that pillar of TALK. And I think playfully too, like I said during class where we’re pretending to sneeze really loud using noises…

Ayelet: Yes, right, right, those social sounds. Yeah, I love that. And actually, just another note about that is that, again, we talk about these four different pillars, sometimes as if they’re four distinct, different things. But there’s always overlap. Just like when we’re working on a communication skill, we’re also often working on a motor skill. And we’re also often working on a cognitive skill. So there is overlap in all of this, especially in those first three years of life. So I love that you brought that to our attention, Miranda.

Let’s talk a little bit about some of those kinds of things in terms of… So we’re talking about blowing the nose, but also like wiping faces, putting a mask on talking through some of those things. Let’s just chat about how we can useTALK in terms of – you had said a little bit about nose blowing, but also tissue pulling, right? Even just taking little pieces of fabric out of a box and just saying some of the words right? Out! Out! Pull! All of these things have so much potential for adding a more language-rich environment into your everyday routines. And so providing those examples of little tiny bits of language to offer during some of those nose blowing and caregiving [routines]. Do you want to give a few more examples? Miranda?

Miranda: Sure. Yeah, I’d love to. I’m thinking now because we talked about that pulling something out of a box: wipes! That’s the same thing is a tissue, right? So maybe you talk about opening the wipe, the little button, push! And then put it in front of your child and maybe you don’t say anything. Maybe you look expectantly at them and just wait, give that power of the pause that we talk about in Learn With Less®, and see what they do. Do they say something back to you? Do they reach for it, but we’re looking at them with this playful expectation that says, Hey, it’s your turn to do something? What are you going to do? So that’s one thing that I’m thinking and then just like you said, maybe it’s not wipes or tissues that you’re pulling out? Because those do get expensive. You know, and they are a valuable resource then maybe we save that empty box to put things in that we’re okay getting continually pulled in and out because…

Ayelet: Yeah, it might be mail – Junk Mail. Yeah, pieces of paper, envelopes that we’re pulling out. It might be postcards, it might be… I’m just thinking about paper now. But other little scraps like scraps of fabric or ribbons or ties or hair ties, hair pulls… any – it can be any little thing! I’m just riffing on different things that you can put in and pull out that are just everyday items used in self care routines.

Miranda: Then thinking about what do we do with like a blanket right off Sometimes we’re hiding behind that. So playing peekaboo thinking about taking that and using it when you’re using a tissue or a wipe. Or maybe you happen to be sitting out waiting to get into a restaurant, the only thing you have in your pocket is the tissue. And it’s a clean one! And you pull it out to play peekaboo, or maybe you pull it out and ball it up in your hand and give a big puff of air and blow it across the table and take turns practicing that back and forth. And again, you’re giving that turn taking which is essential to communication and you’re playing and talking about it. Maybe we do a verbal routine, crumple that tissue or mask or whatever you have in your hand. 1,2,3 – And we throw it in the air! Lots of ways to add language and play and all the pillars.

Ayelet: Yep, that’s right. Yeah, I love that idea of crumpling up a tissue or even a little piece of paper or a mask or whatever it is – something really light right it can be a cotton ball and then blowing it across a floor right the vinyl or laminate or wooden floor. Yeah, and then watch it go! So BLOW, GO, taking something OUT of a box – out! Pretending to sneeze, all of the Ah-CHOO! And ooooh – when is mom or dad or other caregiver going to finish? That anticipation of “choo!” coming right? Or finding a hidden toy, or hidden whisk, under one of a few of the hankies, handkerchiefs, for instance. So yeah, UNDER, ooh, WHERE? Where could it be? You put something under! Where is it?! So much language in there – anything else you can think of Miranda?

Miranda: I was imagining if you don’t have a box to pull things out, of that maybe you shove it in your couch. Or maybe you’re cleaning your socks out of your couch that got taken off and you’re pulling that in a silly way or pretending and you’re pulling! Oh, what did I say? I found a sock. Maybe it’s not a sock, maybe it’s a maybe it’s a tissue, and pretending, or a hand puppet. Put it on as a puppet.

Ayelet: Yeah. Well, I’m thinking about my getting-more-stinky-as-we-go  little people. But there are always socks. There are always socks hanging around the house. That is, yeah, that is the eternal issue… Why are your socks here? Again? Child. Yeah, again, that levity that we talked about in the last episode, when you’re feeling energized and frustrated. How can we bring that a little bit of play and language into that? Love it.

Miranda: And as you’re saying that I’m just thinking about how we’ve talked about repetition with variation. And in this instance, last episode, we talked about how you might say, we need to put your gloves on your feet! Come here. Also, if you have a child that’s resisting nose blowing: we need to blow your nose come here, and you wipe their ear! So using that same concept of I’m going to do something that’s not quite right, in a silly way, you know, using it and then switching it to something different. The next time.

I always talk with parents about all these little things are tools that go in your tool belt. And sometimes when you’re just getting more comfortable using those concepts, it helps to have a script like that. I’ll pretend to put something on a different body part or wipe a different party part or tickle a different body part. So to kind of have that in your mind as a way to help you stretch that muscle of play and talk.

Ayelet: It’s so true. I love how you said that too, Miranda. Because I think that is the real key differentiator of the biggest difference between you and I who came into parenthood with this set of tools… versus a parent or caregiver who really never spent a whole lot of time, maybe, with kids or young children before. Having access to those little tools to pull from, from the very beginning. Now, number one, I want to say that does not solve all the things. So if you’re, if you’re a professional who is hoping to have children one day and thinks you’re gonna be the best parent ever, because you’re already an early interventionist of some kind, yeah, good luck.

Miranda: We will wait for the enlightening, the enlightenment.

Ayelet: Right? But yes, there are there are some nice aspects to having that knowledge. And that is the whole point, I think, of number one, why we’re here with you today. And number two, what Learn With Less® is all about, and what we’re doing in our classes. Miranda, actually, I wanted to just ask you as a Learn With Less® facilitator, what are some of the… because before we hit the record button, we’ve been chatting a little bit about those little moments of “aha moments” for families in your classes. For instance, that when they realize like, Oh, this is what play can look like, Oh, this is what talk can look like, and how simple actually, it really is right? Because we see all this content on Instagram or we read all the parenting books. And we hear all of the messages that oh, we need more and to do more and to buy more and to blah, blah, blah. But really, it’s about simplification and just utilizing these simple simple routines and simple objects. So I was wondering if you could just talk a little bit about that.

Miranda: Yeah, absolutely. I think it’s so interesting to watch parents have this surprise that they come to a class and their child happened to play with a tissue box for 40 minutes. And they did it together with them, and it was fun! Or that they played with a big shower curtain, rising above and below, and that those were the things that their child was most interested in. So I think just that feeling of watching on parents faces experience the delight that their child has in those simple interactions. And then getting to see later on maybe as they’re coming into class or leaving class, that they’re infusing some of that in the moment practicing it. Maybe they’re trying to have a conversation with a parent that they met during their little uncertain thing get fussy, and they pretend to sneeze! Because you’re doing that in class and their little one thought it was so funny, and so they’re like, oh, that worked!

Yeah, so absolutely, I think just watching them see that it’s a simple things. And then like you said, just adding a little bit of variation to it. Just me as a facilitator, I really view it too, as my role is to be like, I’m not doing anything, like I’m literally just pulling a tissue and pretending to go “ah-choo!” This is completely accessible to you. If you don’t have a voice, we can use the action, that we can modify, like, there are thousands of ways to modify this, to make it fun. And just really taking away too, I think that feeling of, “she can do it better than I can” or  “they have more ideas.” No, put it back on them.

Ayelet: Like, actually, your child is going to show us what their ideas are. And then we’re gonna follow what they do. That’s literally, that’s a Learn With Less® class. And also, one thing in there that I really wanted to highlight is it’s not just… your role as a Learn With Less® facilitator is you’re not just illuminating that these are the simple objects that they can play with. It’s that you are connecting that there is a developmental value inherent in the ways in which they can very simply interact with those everyday objects. And you’re taking away the facade or the illusion that it has to be a fancy subscription box full of toys, or it has to be purchased from a specific aisle in a specific kind of store to have developmental value.

You’re totally busting that myth, you’re doing what what I like to talk about is, showing everybody that the emperor has no toys, that it’s just what you already have! You and your child, letting the child lead the way. Noticing what your child is interested in. And then providing a more robust version of these four pillars of play, talk, sing and move, around your child when you have the capacity. And that’s what you are doing and in your Learn With Less® classes, Miranda, and it’s clearly helping the families in your community because they keep coming back!

Miranda: And it’s so it’s so fun to just model that, you highlighting, we’re watching what the kids are doing, right? We’re watching what the babies and the infants are interested in and what they’re doing. And I think, too, we model that by also watching what our parents do, you know, in class, that whole parallel process! If you see a parent that happens to be pretending, if you see in that class, or maybe they’re gently waving a blanket up and down and up and down. And we might gently nudge them and say, Tell me more about why you did that. Or, I saw that you noticed your little one really wanted that scarf. They were looking intently at it. How did you think to do that little song? And just looking at the parents and watching them and letting them lead. That way they can do the same thing with their little ones.

Ayelet: That’s right. And then the value of doing that within a group setting is that other families can notice that, and see that, and observe different ways of being with children. And my goodness, especially as we come out of the deepest, darkest depths of COVID. What a beautiful, what a beautiful thing. And I will say we’ve been doing also all of these classes virtually, as well. And that is an incredible thing to witness because as we know virtual connection can be actually just as fulfilling in many ways.

Miranda: Yes. From from here in Michigan to you in California, Ayelet.

Ayelet: Here we are right now! Exactly. Right. So let’s just wrap this one up today, this episode. Go ahead, Miranda, and let us know where people can find this special little present that you have created for our listeners.

Miranda: You can add the earlyinterventionmama.com/dailyroutinesfreebie. I’d love to have you download my dressing routines guide.

Ayelet: So fun. So fun. So fun. Awesome. And then of course, you can go to learnwithless.com/blueprint to download the Learn With Less® infant & toddler development blueprint that really kind of outlines just all of those four different pillars that we’re talking about in these four episodes as well. So hurray, head over to our Instagram and Facebook profiles, as well, for some more visual content around what we’re talking about today at @earlyinterventionmama and @learnwithless, and go ahead and DM us if you have ideas or thoughts or takeaways from these episodes, because we love to hear what people say. And of course, also feel free to comment on on our stuff, because it’s really fun! And it’s actually I love having these conversations with you, Miranda, so I’m looking forward to our next episode! Until then, we’ll see y’all next time.

Miranda: Goodbye!

How to Incorporate Language into Everyday Routines, with Miranda Zoumbaris and Ayelet Marinovich

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